Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize