I murdered the dance floor call the cops
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize