Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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