i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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