My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.