Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
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