i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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