you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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