god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
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