this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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