Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
