i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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