maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
it glows. i had to have it.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Randomize