I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
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well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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