Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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