So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
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