they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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