His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face