I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize