Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
