don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Randomize
