I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
