i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
