i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
