Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
