Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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