butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
