And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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