hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
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