i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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