please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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