the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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