He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
