I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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