The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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