Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
