so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize