He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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