i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize