It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
