How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize