Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
