He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
