I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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