So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
