didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
