How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
