I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
