Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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