Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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