Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
